Friday, December 10, 2010

Perhaps the worst zombie film ever?

One thing I noticed inrecent months--Vampires seem to be on the wane somewhat, and zombies are back in a BIG way!
I recently had the displeasure of viewing Autumn, perhaps not omly the crappiest zombie movie ever made, but a good contestant in the running for worst overall movie ever made, too!  This film is an adaptation of the first installment of a series of zombie novels by an author named David Moody.  That's all I know, that's all I need to know. I won't go near it. Anyway, who wants to read a zombie novel, anyway? 95% of the fun is to watch the f/x team work their magic in zombie makeup, gore, and zombies getting their heads blown off!
Where do I start? OK, the first thing I noticed is that Dexter Fletcher is in it, from "Band of Brothers" and the awesome submarine thriller, "Below".  After seeing this, I do hope he fired his agent.  He gave an OK performance, but really, the movie was so bad it made him look sucky, rather than he bring the film up.
Next, the graphic on the DVD case, and if I remember correctly (I'm really trying to block out these wasted 2 hours of my life), the menu screen, showed a matte painting of the NYC skyline, complete with a collapsed Brooklyn Bridge. Cool, huh?  I watch "Life After People" on the History Channel just for this kinda thing. Where was that scene in "Autumn"? Good question. Almost as good as the question "Where is this set--America or England?" The answers to both questions being: A) No where in the film whatsoever, and B) Who freakin cares?.
The entire film is full of poor choices--artistically, dramatically, and cinematographically.  The acting was dreadful, even Dexter Fletcher's (sorry, Dex!) The camera shots, especially toward the end of the movie, looked like a film student experimenting with a new camera, andf trying out EVERY SINGLE FEATURE.  The inclusion of David Carradine in this pic makes me curious... is this why he killed himself? The three minutes of screentime for the late Mr. Carradine is not only forgettable, but if it were his last film, a pathetic legacy to leave behind.
Nowhere in the film was the word "zombie"; "meat-suits" was their cute moniker for the undead in this film.  Use it once or twice, OK. Use the phrase countless times throughout the movie, and it turns sucky along with the rest of the film.
So, in summation, if  you like zombie movies, and have 2 hours to kill, avoid this film and watch "Zombieland" one more time.